And with that help came hope....

As many of my readers know, I am a hopeful person plagued by bad luck and the occasional depression. This last month had been particularily hard on my family and I. There have been those times where I just wanted to give up. Let it all go. Throw my hands up in the air and say SCREW IT. Of course, you already know that if you read my other posts.

Point being, I did not give up. I just don’t have it in me to give up. I’m a stubborn Irish girl. I was raised to be stubborn, I will always be stubborn. That’s just me.

And thank goodness I have that stubborn streak, because without it I would have failed long ago. Thank God for my on-line friends and my IRL family who have held me up when I would have given up. You are all a blessing.

Today, amidst all this chaos and depression and generally awful things going on in my life, I received another blessing. It was in the form of monetary help. This came as a surprise to me, though I had prayed for the help and should not really have been surprised because of our level of need. God provides, and sometimes He does so through an encouraging word from a friend (LMA and Michelle!). Other times He does so through a defining moment in your life. And other times He provides through His vessels on earth.

I know not all my readers are Christian, and I love you all the more for it because that is what Jesus says I should do. Regardless of your religious affinity or lack of, it can not be denied that I needed help and hope and it was given to me. I just had to be patient in my soul and in my faith.

What is the point of all this? Well the point is that I have never kept the dark parts of my soul a secret. I have never been anything other than what I am. I have never tried to fit into any predefined definition of what a Christian should be, I have only sought to hear the voice of God as the words of His son, Jesus. In doing so, I have learned that we must be patient. Help and hope will come, but only if you submit to the faith that there is a greater life than this, a greater purpose and a greater need. I do not attend church. I hate large groups of people, they make me nervous. I am socially inept. I get terrible anxiety in large groups of people (especially grocery shopping, I hate that.) Even though I have never attended the church, they came to help me. They did not have to do this. There was no reason for them to help me, as I am not an attending member of the congregation. Yet they came anyways.

And with that help came hope for a better future amid all the bleakness I often feel invading my spirit.

And you can’t put a price tag on hope.